Phew! I thought I forever lost this. It just so happened that I posted it in another blog, instead of my own blog. Hehehe! Senior moment!
“He who searches must walk.”
I have been a member of the Light of Jesus Family for almost four years now, but I joined the PLW (Prayer and Life Workshops) three months ago because I was in search of something — something far deeper, more profound, and more significant in my life. After several weeks of diligent and faithful attendance, I found what I was looking for.
The PLW was very timely because it coincided with my commitment to serve at the He Cares Foundation and eventually inculcated in me a preferential option for God’s poor. The second session of the workshop coincided with my first day of service at He Cares. Since I work at night, I lacked a much-needed sleep. I was dog tired by afternoon after a fruitful service and fellowship in the morning.
I learned from one of my PLW sessions that “prayer should challenge life and vice versa.” The PLW challenged my life all right. It challenged me to leave my comfort zone and walk on waters. I experienced walking on waters when I learned to love God’s poor. This was a daunting task for me because I grew up in a punitive environment, which contributed to my being fearful, anxious, and insecure. It dawned upon me that I had so much difficulty embracing God’s poor all through the years because I don’t personally know them at all. Some of them are so messed up that it’s hard to see God’s face in them. Most of them are even “fruits of moral and family disintegration.” Now that I know at least some of them, I can say that I’m learning to love them gradually — in small, baby steps — at a pace I’m very comfortable with. I am slowly unveiling God’s face in each and every one of them every time I serve at He Cares.
“Only a poor person can serve the poor.” My family was financially and spiritually poor while I was growing up, so the face of poverty is not novel to me. In fact, it’s so familiar that I refuse to stare it in the face any longer, but here I am, serving at He Cares Foundation where God sent me to cater to the needs of the street children. I saw the need to serve them, so I decided to stay. Now, I look at poverty in a different light, and I can say that I can stare it in the face without flinching anymore. Because of the PLW, I encounter God’s love in the silence of my heart. Since I reside in Christ and witness love grows, I strive to transcend His love to the poor children entrusted to me.
I bask in God’s love every Saturday afternoon and during my sacred half-hour (prayer time), and this kind of love lasts until Saturday morning. The superficial “existential loneliness” is either put aside, forgotten, or erased, and I find myself falling in love with God’s poor over and over again.
